Divorce is a complicated process. It is especially difficult to cope with it to a person who intended to save the family and was struck by his or her partner’s statement about divorce. Besides, divorce drags a lot of additional complications with it: changes in family structure, finances, living arrangements, obligations, time-spending with kids and so on.
How To Realize Loss?
There is a common belief that coping with divorce is something people can work through. But reality blows the victims of divorce with its chaos and constant swings and once somebody hires a lawyer, there is no point of return, according to Berkman Bottger Newman & Schein LLP. It’s emotional baggage that you want to get rid of but can’t. And even ordering cheap divorce papers online won’t dispel anxiety.
The process is different for everyone. It depends on the aspects of the divorce: whether one of the partners betrayed the other, or the marriage was disintegrating right in front of one’s eyes. Even if you had an extremely strong wish to end this relationship, you still had tight bonds connecting you two. Feelings of sadness, fury, hopelessness, longing, and guilt are normal. But the loss you had to go through will inevitably wake up fresh thoughts, ideas, dreams, and intentions.
How to Cope With Loss?
Let Yourself Grieve
Don’t hide your own emotions deep in your soul, take a break instead, realize and understand them. Get support from your occupation. Don’ get isolated. Take another route – find new connections, expand your circle of friends, join a class. Look forward, make plans, but don’t dig at one place being stuck in the past.
Take Good Care of Yourself
Respect your body as it suffers too. What is more, getting back in shape will motivate you to move on and start from a blank sheet of paper. It is beneficial to exercise, no matter whether you worked out before of not. If not, then it’s a suitable reason to start. It is unnecessary to exhaust yourself to tears at the gym. Take up an activity that you truly enjoy and that can immensely benefit your physical shape. Exercising is a natural way to relieve stress and elevate mood, as when a person works out, her or his body releases endorphins, hormones of happiness.
Do you think that junky food is what can help you deal with stress? This is a major misconception! Never resort to sugary and fatty foods in order to overcome stress. Try to feed your organism with healthy food after filing for divorce online and change your eating habits for the better ones.
What about alcohol? Many people think it is a stimulator but it acts as a depressant, therefore, it can deepen your anxiety. Disruptions in sleep patterns in connecting with alcohol abuse as well are characteristic of the post-divorce period. Try to find the perfect balance in the amount of sleep you need as both too much or too little sleep can affect your physical and psychological states.
Don’t Succumb to Your Friends’ Encouragement to Date
In movies, people’s friends often organize dates for them, choose partners, restaurants. It looks ridiculous on the screen but this is not the right strategy to move on after divorce. These pressures can make you feel wrong – why should I move on as fast as others want me to?
But, on the other hand, there is a possibility that you meet your second ‘second half’ pretty soon after breaking up with the first one. If that person brings comfort and love, supports you sincerely and makes you ecstatic in general then trust your instincts. If you feel a residue from past relationships and are not ready to open your heart up to another person it’s normal to say ‘No’.
Maintain a Sense of Humor
Never forget to laugh even in stressful situations. Stay positive – life is covered in stripes, black and white, both of them don’t weaken us but on the contrary – bring strength to your spirit. Even if you are not granted the gift of telling jokes, become part of the company that improves your mood. Don’t lose the taste of life, it’s too beautiful to be wasted.
Surround yourself with positive and sociable people. You might feel like being alone for some time. But rejecting any real communication with the outside world will definitely lead to a feeling of depression and loneliness.
Explore Your Interests
It is better to try and find out that activity doesn’t suit you than only think about it. Therapists encourage people to check out cooking or baking. Cooking is a unique experience: eating something that you have created is twice more satisfying than eating out or poisoning yourself with fast food and Chinese takeout. Reinvent yourself, start doing something you have always dreamed of but never found the courage to start.
Declutter and Reorganize the House
Throw away or sell all the unnecessary stuff, which is being covered in dust. Adjust the bedroom to your needs and preferences. This is probably the room that reminds you the most about your ex-spouse. What is more, if you use the Internet to file divorce papers online with onlinedivorcer.com, you will save a decent amount of cash – spend them on house renovation. Don’t neglect the power of the color of walls, the number of plants and other decorations. These are small meticulous details but they can truly satisfy our need in aesthetic beauty and harmony. A clean room equals to clean mind.
Accept the past, but don’t forget it. Keep the balance, don’t give in to junky food, alcohol, dru*s, isolation. Rejuvenate like a phoenix from ashes. Even if you are 60, life is not over even when it seems to get close to the final.